Just a note.
I do love and miss my family.

WE are all here. 

Hale hale the gang's all here.....

Carla, Kathy, Bill, my self and the dogs.  Bubba, Gator, VooDoo, Dancer, Hemi, Naughty. 

There will be cigars!

There will be Beer!

There will be racing!!


And there will be fun.

The Conspiracy:

It’s a conspiracy you know.  I am a computer genius and I know these things.  Computers, machines, and all types of electronics are taking over the world.  I know what you are thinking, ‘Just another raving lunatic who has had his knickers on too tight, or been smoking a little too much wacky weed.’  I am here to tell you I never wore, Knickers, and I don’t smoke, Wacky Weed.  Just you never mind what I do smoke, OK.

Back to this conspiracy, remember the matrix, ultimately all we had become is batteries for the machines in the world.  Maybe not next week, or next year but it’s coming you mark my words.  Ok time for some examples.  You think I am going to start off with some great military industrial complex example right.  Just like Terminator 3 or such, nope it’s right under our noses and we don’t even see the revolution.

Bathrooms, yep you heard me the common every day public restroom.   Now hear me out on this before you mark me down as a nut job.  Well I may be a nut tomorrow, but today I am going to be condiments. We all think it’s a good idea to wash your hands and flush when you are done with the paper work.  All good but it is after all a public washroom, do you really want to touch the same seat and handle as that mouth breather from 3 cubicles down?  Of course not, but you have to, then you go wash your hands and well you know the routine.  

Turning on and off the water was always stupid.  You wash your hands with soap and then with your clean hands you touch the same faucet that was touched by Mr. Dufus from the second floor.  And it’s not limited to men.  No I walked by the women’s restroom last week and the fumes about reached under the door and dragged me back in.  It was all I could do to hang on to a door handle till a buddy came by and aided me in my escape from the odor.  No this is not a man only thing, I am pretty certain this transformation has taken place in Women’s restrooms as well just like across the country just like men’s.

So some evil genius went to the owner of a business one day and sold him on this idea of an automatic faucet.   The business owner was sold on the idea that people would not soil their hands turning on and off the faucet, nobody would accidently leave the faucet running, and think of the time people would save.  Everybody would wash their hands because they don’t have to turn on the faucets, people would smile again, and manna would flow from the heavens.  At least I am pretty sure that’s the way the salesman probably made it sound.  Is that the result, oh no.

You have seen them, those poor wet souls who were trying to wash their hands in a bathroom with automatic faucets.  First they get soap all over their hands and then…. Nothing…. No water, no moisture.  Often seen in airport restrooms (these are particularly dangerous places, more on that later) yes there they are waving and gesticulating madly trying to get the water to come out.  Only to … yes you have seen this.  They put their head in the sink and KARFOOSH!  Lots a water.  All in their eyes, up their nose, and all over that nice clean shirt, but none on the hands.  Now what’s the next thing somebody in that condition is going to do, yep wipe the water out of their eyes but NO NOT WITH YOUR HANDS COVERED WITH,  oops too late.   

Remember inside each of those faucets is going to be a sensor and a microprocessor of sorts all connected to the power grid.  You don’t think those things run on batteries do you?  

Next came the automatic soap dispensers.  Of course it makes perfect sense that since we have automatic water we also have automatic soap dispensers.  These too have sensors, microprocessors, and are connected to the power grid.  Well since we have you not touching the faucet or the soap why touch the paper towel dispenser.  Now we have the Water, Soap, and Paper Towels all automatically dispensed.   When they work correctly, and that is rarely.  

I know these things talk to each other.  You can almost hear if you are digitally inclined.   Walk into the room with your cell phone and if your cell phone is having a bad day, you will to before you leave that restroom.  It will transmit to the tower, the tower will send the signal down the electrical lines.  The damn phone has a GPS in it the computers no longer have to triangulate your position.  

Used to be you would see some poor schmuck walk into the can only to walk out a wet, soapy eyed mess and wonder what happened.  That was before GPS’s in the cell phones.  Now the computer in the cell phone talks to the computer in the faucet and the target is much more easily found.  

We have all seen them, waving their hands under the faucet, trying to get soap on then off, or tugging at the automatic towel dispenser.  Folks this is not where the insidious danger lies.  No this is merely for the entertainment value.  The serious issues lie in the little steel room where the porcelain receptacle is found.

Folks I warn you this may not be for the weak of heart.  But consider the current invasion we are now facing.   You walk into the room, complete your task and unbeknown to you somebody has now installed an automatic flusher!   Yes you stand up and suddenly, Kar-foosh! Down goes the water.  You think OK but I haven’t completed the paperwork yet.  Next you are treated to a crescendo of Kar-Foosh, Kar-Foosh, Kar-Foosh, as if the bloody thing were trying to tell you something.  Maybe they are scent operated?

So you turn to the dispenser and … Shee-It.  No that’s what you just did.  But there it is starring you in the face, an automatic toilet paper dispenser.   Folks this stuff is fragile if it weren’t it would clog up pipes from here to Brazil, Bangladesh, and hit Zimbabwe along the route.   If you get too little, well, you know what that’s going to mean.  You will be forced to wash your hands before you got back to work and do battle with the evil faucet.    If you get too much suddenly the automatic Lu won’t flush and now what do you do?  Or worse it goes on a flushing rampage while you are trying to deal with an over abundance of TP.  There you stand with a wad the size of a basket ball in a receptacle designed for a good base ball and ain’t nothing gonna go down there.   And of course the water fall that is inevitably going to make your walk back to your cubical a soggy embarrassing mess.

So these things have to be delicately adjusted.  These automatic TP dispensers.   Not too much TP, certainly not too little, and don’t shred it on the way out.  But that’s not what’s happening is it.  You will see them all over the place people looking lost and confused.  As they walk out of the restroom soap in their eyes, water on their shirt stinking, because the automatic TP dispenser short changed them.  That’s just the state of mind the computer of this world want us in.  You think it was a management decision to install automatic faucets, paper dispensers, soap dispensers, toilet flushers, and TP dispensers.  No it was not! Well at least not in the executive washrooms.  In the wash room us peons have to use we are left to fight with this technology on our most base level.  Executive wash rooms have an operator.  You don’t really think they would pay some dude to hand you a towel do you.  No his job is to keep the technology at bay for the executives.  

If they were all going wild at one place of business the management would eventually have these devices fixed.  But where can they just run amuck and never be noticed.  Yes you guessed it, at the airport.  Lots of hapless victims and very few ever go tell the management.  I am quite certain the root of all this evil is a massive networked complex of toilets in the airport hubs across America.  

Now think about it.  The faucet, wired to the power grid, the toilet wired to the power grid, the electric TP dispenser, wired to the power grid, and you walk into a small metal box surrounded by all this technology about to go wrong.   

Mark my words some day there will be the head line, “Man electrocuted in the Can, film at 11:00.”  At that time you will remember, I told you so.  As for me, I live in the desert, I am going to step outside and take a leak.  

I wish to paint humors albeit probably an HR violation image that I think only a dog person such as your self could visualize the entire painful ramifications of this.

Our puppy (Hemi the flying poodle) is at that stage where she jumps up and grabs everything with her sharp tiny puppy teeth.

You know what this is like, you are trying to put on socks and shoes and she keeps running off with your socks.  Or actually pulling on them as your toes slide into the (OUCH!)

You know what this is like you are stepping out of the shower and she is playing tug of war with the towel you are trying to dry your self with. 

Then suddenly she starts jumping for other things that are hanging down and.  Next thing you know your wife is rolling on the floor with her makeup streaked across her cheeks in howls of laughter.  Of course your howling as well but it ain't laughter.

Now mind you there were no emergency runs to the hospital, and future performance isn't going to be an issue. 

Primarily the only thing really hurt was my pride, but it's off set by the visual of my wife almost falling to the floor with laughter. 

So how goes your Friday morning? 

Lets see how many more days is Carla waking up?  Is it 10 or 15 more days?  No she says only 3, but I am thinking she will wake up friday as well.

We have a couple weeks till the big gathering at Paw Thorn Acres. 

and I have updated Skydog with some new pictures. 

Hows it going out there in cyber world?

Lazarus Long once said the first indication of demise of a civilization is the loss of common courtesy.

What is it with people and black cars?  Maybe because I ride so much and see the asphalt go by at 60 ~ 70 miles per hour just waiting to grind the flesh from my bones, that I pay attention to common road courtesy.    Those little things people do that endanger my life, because they were in a hurry or just don’t care about their fellow man.   In the 70’s when I rode a lot we used to watch out for little old ladies with blue hair and white tennis shoes.  Or was it little old ladies with white hair and blue tennis shoes?  Oh well never mind that was the greatest risk to a motorcycle rider.  Because they really didn’t register that you were a motor vehicle.  The *REALLY* didn’t mean to run you over.    Not so any more.  Today it’s black cars. 

Because I am so very close and connected with the road I see lots of people on their cell phones.  It amazes me there haven’t been more deaths because of them.  When you ride a lot you develop a sixth sense about what people are going to do.  It’s not magic it’s just the driver starts to speed up and you realize they are going to cut in front of you.  Or he starts to move slowly from one lane to another and you realize they are going to make a lane change.  I can easily see into cars when I am riding (Unless they have blacked out windows – back to that black car thing) so I can easily see when they are on the phone.  People on cell phones don’t make those subtle little movements that telegraph their intention.   They just freaking change lanes, turn in front of you or basically drive like they are the only thing on the road.  But again, like the little old ladies of the 70’s they are not intentionally doing it. 

Black cars; trucks; SUVs; however the drivers seem to drive as if they freaking bought the dam road.  The more the car appears to be worth, the worse this seems to be, up to about $100,000.00 or more.  The guy with a black Lamborghini or Ferrari seems to be somewhat cautious about his movements, don’t’ know why?  But if it looks like a $55,000.00 Ford, Chevy, or Dodge pickup, or black car with Blacked out windows I back away because he’s going to do something stupid.  I say he but it could just as well be a she.  I have seen appalling behavior from women as well as men driving what they think is their Billy Bad Ass car cuz it’s black.

Now let that soak in for a minute.  I live and commute in a wealthy area.  Many of my neighbors are significantly richer then I am and some are richer than god.  These are literally my neighbors.  I drive to work and home every day following the same vehicles.    And the color of the vehicle denotes the aggressiveness and dangerousness way in which that driver will drive.   Right now you are probably saying to yourself;  “Self he is off his rocker the color of a vehicle doesn’t tell a person how to drive.  There is no hidden device in a black vehicle that radiates the brain with waves that make him drive like an Ass Hole.  Any more than there is a device in pickup trucks that radiates the brain and makes men want to chew tobacco, spit, and listen to country music.” 

I would say to you that you are right.  But it’s the attitude of, “I wanna be a Billy Bad Ass and drive a black vehicle” that I think these drivers have before their color selection.    Yes Color of vehicle (If Black) will denote a dangerous and reckless driver.  He/She will cut you off, speed around you, drive more aggressively, and basically endanger your life.  ESPECIALLY if you’re on a motorcycle because he can always just claim, ‘it’s not my fault I didn’t see him.’

Two cases in point.  Remember my last post about evading a speeding ticket.  What was tailgating me was NOT a white car,  It was NOT one of Scottsdale’s Police Volvos.   Yes they have them.  It was a blacked out car, tail gating me.   Like many others have.

Second  case in point.  I am driving down Pima road last night.  It’s dark and I can’t see the cars and the color of cars around me very well.  Some car that has been following me up Pima for a couple of miles then speeds up and is now tailgating me.  Again….. There is a car in the right lane and I am just off his bumper traveling about 5 miles to 8 miles over the speed limit.  The distance between me and the car in the left lane is (If I was directly behind him) about 1 motorcycle length.  In other words I am about 5 to 8 feet in back of him but in the left lane.  This guy who’s tailgating me whips into the right lane.  So now I realize he really wants to get in front of me.  Before I have a chance to react he then cuts in front of me. 

Remember between the car in the right lane and me there is maybe 15 ~ 20 feet but it’s a diagonal space.  If I was a car the space would have been 10 feet.  But because I am a bike there IS room for this ass hole to cut me off, and yes It was a black car.  No I am not kidding. 

So we get up to the stop light.  The one that changed just after he cut me off and I had to break.  And I realize this isn’t some monster SUV, or Truck or any of those other ego machines.  Nope, this is a smart car.  This freaking thing is bearely bigger than my Goldwing, and he is still driving like he freaking bought the gawd dam road with that smart car.  The smart Car of Beaverly Hills sells to idiots!  He still has his California license plate on the car.  Even though He is a Arizona resident.  Why do I think he’s an Arizona resident.  Because at the beginning of this saga I mentioned that I drive to work with the same people every day.  He goes to down Pima at the same time.  He turns in and out of a gated community of condos right off of Dynamite.  This is my neighbor who drives like he doesn’t care. 

And I am sorry but that old song and dance about, “I am sorry I didn’t see you.”  That just doesn’t cut it.  He had to freaking swerve to get around me.  If he really didn’t see me he would have just dam well run over me. 

Like I said Lazarus Long once said the first indication of demise of a civilization is the loss of common courtesy.  Realy Lazarus was Robert Heinlein.

Keep the rubber side down.

So....

So I am riding home at dusk last night. 

Well...
We made another trip to California this weekend. 

We learned VooDoo missed the dirt.

We bagged up 35 trash bags full of tree clippings.  Nod to Kathy & Bill to trimmed all that!!! 
The back yard was full of branches.  It took the better part of Saturday to clean up.

We are now safely back in Scottsdale.